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Sent to a friend there are nights when i dont seem to fit my body and i get headaches all the time, i dont typically like people at all, no one. i have a girlfriend and she bothers me a lot too. sometimes i just want to scream as loud as i can, sometimes i have the urge to just yell at people to stop being so rude. when im sitting someplace or walking about and someone is being rude to either myself or another person i have to greatest desire to hurt them and make them understand how they should behave and how the should not behave around decent people. ive considered hitting people and telling them bad a lot too. but worse is when i just feel angry about something and it wont leave me alone, i can sit and stew in something for months and once in a while ill feel lighter and relieved like its over, but then its back again like it was waiting for me to stop paying attention. sometimes i just feel like hitting myself but it hurts and i dont like it. i know its not right to hit other people, but why doesnt it bother me to hurt them? why does it piss me off so much when i see someone being picked on? there was a guy on this bus once who wouldnt leave a homosexual man alone about his life choices and i wanted so badly to stand up and cut his ears off since he wasnt using them, he didnt seem to hear the poor man saying to leave him alone. instead i just punched him and told him to leave him alone or so help me i will make you leave him alone. thing is i wanted him to do something so i could. i think i need help. i dont know what to do or anything and im affraid i might hurt someone someday. more and more often i find myself having to debate inside myself whether or not it would be alright to do something i know i shouldnt have to question.Rating:0.00
